No Regrets Monday- Your Life…Work?

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This is a series describing some of the regrets folks have shared during the last days of their lives.  The goal is NOT to add guilt to your life, but to allow you to take a look at where you are and take the opportunity to make changes.  I hope this effort will provide insight into your behavior and your long-term goals.  Blessing on your journey!

One of the crazy characteristics of American’s is that most of us DON’T use our vacation days.  According to a survey by CNBC, only 28% of Americans in 2019 planned to use all of their vacation days that year!  

Are we addicted to work?  Are we afraid that taking all or most of our vacation days would send a message to our boss that we are not fully committed?  Do we dislike being at home?  Do we lack the funds to take a vacation therefore we decide to just work instead?  Do you feel that staying home is a waste of time?  I’m sure that all of these are excuses are used to forego our vacation time.

One of the most common regrets shared by those in their final days is that they wish they hadn’t worked so much!

I am SUPER guilty here.  I can’t remember EVER taking a “staycation”.  I have forfeited so many vacation days unused it is ridiculous.  I really can’t point to a single reason other than the feeling that taking a day off without a trip somewhere was just a waste of time.  Additionally, I remember judging my friends who would literally game the system to max out ALL the time off.  Some would take every last hour that was allowed in the formula.

I think that some of it is cultural.  We pound the work ethic into our children to convince then that this is the only way to get ahead.  But is it really that important in our career?

During the Great Recession, my salary was cut in half along with others in my work group.  Most of the group cut back their hours accordingly.  I was in leadership and sales (seeking work that wasn’t there!) and I felt obligated to continue to work full time for half pay.  Although I was commended for my efforts during these tough times, it really had no long term effect on my standing as an employee.  The folks that surgically cut their hours were not treated differently than I was.  I don’t regret what I did, but it was a real learning experience for me.

So what should you do?  TAKE THE TIME OFF!  Spend time relaxing.  It’s good for you!  Spend time with your family.  Create lasting memories with loved ones EVERY chance you can get.  I would lay out the ground rules early with your employer.  Tell them that you intend to use your vacation days.  They will respect you for it and won’t be surprised when you max out your time off.  EXCEED THE AMOUNTS IF YOU NEED TO!  If you are salaried and you wish additional time off, let them know that you are prepared to forego pay in exchange for vacation time, if necessary.  Don’t abuse the benefit, but TAKE ADVANTAGE of the opportunity that it affords..

PLEASE…Take your time off.  Relax, recharge, create memories.  You will find that it’s good for you, your family AND your employer.  The time off should make you a better employee (and spouse, and parent and friend)!  And more importantly, as you review your choices later in life, this is a formula to avoid a potential painful and very common regret!  

Boring Freedom

I have always liked the 4th of July for what it is.  A day of celebration of family, good food and a reflection on how we have been blessed as a nation.  A day at the beach or the pool is usually in order.  Relax and watch the waves or spend some time on the boat enjoying family and friends.  Nothing really spectacular or unique or cool.  Some fireworks and good food.

The 4th is the celebration of freedom, right?  We all enjoy the gift of living in the United States and probably take freedom for granted.  Freedom is an amazing gift but like any other good thing it can be abused.

I feel like we are losing our grip on the simple and boring.  We do not celebrate this kind of thinking as a country anymore.  If you have simple and wholesome values, you can actually be ridiculed now for being boring and normal.  The fringe is what we celebrate.  The unique and sometimes even outrageous.  If you are a quiet and average American you are not cool.  So what is so wrong with normal?

We have become a nation that is obsessed with freedom for the edges and the fringe.  And what we have lost along the way is innocence and a respect for the simple and good.  This obsession over cool and edgy has been the breeding ground for a generation to grow up too quickly. The self-indulged “right” to express yourself however you want. The change of a complete generation’s life goals from “raise a nice family” to power and money.

We have transformed as a nation into one giant, never ending, self-centered argument. We have lost the ability to communicate.  We only yell at each other.  We’ve completely lost any vision to see the other side.  In this noise, there is no celebration for the boring people who go to work each day and try hard to raise a family and maintain some semblance of normalcy and reality for life.  Trying to shield our children from the nonsense.  This celebration of the outrageous.  The “big show” going on around us.

I think we need to get back to our roots.  Review our values.  Be frank about what we have created.  Review our commitment to the next generation.   Can we do it?  Or is the genie out of the bottle?

This 4th of July, I celebrate freedom for everyone including the boring people.  They want the opportunity to live without being cool or edgy.  Just have a great day with family and friends and be thankful for the blessings.  Nothing spectacular.  Nothing epic.  Just another boring 4th of July!